Please enquire if you need access to therapy in another language as we are sometimes able to offer this.
Frequently-asked questions
What is unique about Tavistock Relationships’ counselling & psychotherapy services?
Tavistock Relationships offers counselling and therapy services to couples, individuals and parents.
It is probably one of the largest psychotherapy providers in London. Tavistock Relationships has a team of around 100 therapists, counsellors and psychologists who deliver together around 20,000 sessions a year. We also provide online therapy via a secured, confidential webcam platform to those who live outside of London.
Our core therapeutic model has been developed over more than 70 years. It combines professional expertise, in-depth theoretical knowledge, with research and training therapists. A number of innovative psychotherapy approaches stemmed from this core method. These approaches help a range of relationship difficulties, psychosexual problems, parenting issues, separation and divorce and other specialised programmes.
Does couple therapy help?
The short answer is that in the right hands relationship therapy is very likely to help, does help and can actually change lives.
Based on our experience and feedback from clients, it can not only help but in addition can effect change both within the relationship and in the individuals.
We have two sources of evidence for this. First, looking at the experience of service data from hundreds of individuals and couples after the first six weeks of therapy, and then at the end. The results show high satisfaction rate, with 90% of our users rating the sessions as helpful. The vast majority also said that the sessions helped them to a better understanding of themselves, their partner and improved the relationship with their children.
Second, we use reliable and well-validated measures to assess well-being, mental health symptoms and relationship satisfaction throughout the therapy. Our research team has recently published the outcome of the largest naturalistic study in couple therapy ever published. The results show convincingly that our model, as delivered by therapists that were trained here, is indeed effective as a treatment for relationship distress and for individual distress in addition.
Are our services confidential?
Yes. Tavistock Relationships' therapists adhere to our professional code of ethical standards which includes the principle of confidentiality.
This means that we would not disclose information about you to a third party without your agreement, except in situations where there was significant concern about harm to you or someone else and this would normally be discussed with you beforehand.
If you come as a couple we would normally expect that information can be shared between you. If you have any questions about confidentiality you can discuss them with your therapist.
What happens after our initial consultation?
Following your initial appointment we will carefully consider the most suitable way forward for you. If we think that other organisations would be better placed to help you, we will signpost you in their direction.
If we refer you to our counselling, psychotherapy or psychosexual services we will look for an appropriate appointment for you for regular weekly sessions.
There may be a wait until a suitable vacancy can be offered, particularly if your times are limited. Once an appointment is offered it will be for the same time each week with the same therapist. It is rarely possible to move the time or day of the session once you start and any sessions you have to cancel or miss need to be paid for at your agreed fee.
Do I have to do anything before I attend?
No, you don’t, although you might find it useful to think about your situation and how you want counselling or psychotherapy to help.
What has led you to seek help? What are the things you wish to change? Are there issues in your relationship currently or from the past that you want to understand, or repeating patterns in your relationships that are causing you problems? These sorts of questions will be explored with you at your first appointment.
Do clinicians have special training?
Yes. Tavistock Relationships is a centre of excellence for accredited training and research in couple relationships.
Our counsellors and psychotherapists bring a wealth of clinical experience from a variety of related settings including social work and clinical psychology, and many have experience in working with individuals as well as couples.
Our clinicians undertake a very rigorous training, with substantial further supervised practice. This represents the highest standards of professional training in counselling and psychotherapy with couples, in the UK and beyond. As part of our commitment to professional development you may be seen by a trainee psychotherapist or counsellor working under specialist supervision.
How often will I have to attend?
After the initial consultation, if we think we can offer you the help you need, you will be offered a regular weekly appointment at the same time and day each week.
These sessions will continue for as long as both you and your therapist feel it is helpful. In some of our services such as our Parenting Services and the Divorce and Separation Service, the sessions are less frequent and the number of sessions may be fixed at the start of therapy.
Can I come on my own?
Yes. Of course you can. We see lots of people on their own and sometimes it's because their partner doesn't wish to attend. On the other hand, it is a lot easier to sort out relationship problems if you both come, so we will encourage you to encourage them.
We also have a service for individuals who may not be in a relationship, or who want therapy that helps with something only concerning themselves.
How do I tell my partner?
Talking to your partner is the first step to getting some help and for some people it can be the most difficult part of the whole process! Many couples suffer in silence, feeling unhappy and despairing but unable to find words to talk about the problems.
Some people feel that asking your partner to go to counselling is tantamount to asking for a separation, but that just isn't true. Couples come to Tavistock Relationships every day and improve and strengthen their relationship. Nobody can tell you how to talk to your partner because each person has a different relationship, but if you find you really can't open up the conversation, sometimes coming to see us on your own first can help the whole process along.
Whether you decide to tell family or friends is up to you. Some people feel shy of doing so but you'd be surprised how many people will admire your decision to sort out your issues. Sometimes it can be tricky to ask for time off work, though some workplaces are very understanding about giving a long lunch hour to come for your appointment. Tavistock Relationships understands this which is why we offer conveniently timed sessions thoughout the day and during the evenings Monday to Friday, with some availability on Saturdays.
Do I need the psychosexual service?
During the initial consultation, we think with you about the sort of help that would be most effective at that point.
Many people find that sexual problems occur at the same time as other challenges in their relationship and on occasion, while there is a a sexual problem present, it may be helped by therapy in our general service.
If the psychosexual service is indicated, then part of the therapy would also be addressing relationship issues alongside working specifically to improve your sex life. We find that this is the most effective way to work with couples experiencing sexual difficulties.
Can I bring my children?
We see couples and individuals and although you may discuss your children and parenting issues in the sessions, we do not see you with your children in the therapy.
We understand that it may be difficult for parents to arrange childcare, but we want to create a space where you and your partner can speak to each other freely, and so bringing your child into your appointment with you is not possible.
Tavistock Relationships does not have crèche facilities, and it is not possible to leave children in our waiting area whilst you have your appointment.
Why do I need to pay for missed appointments?
It may feel difficult to pay for a session that you are not able to use. This is however important as the therapeutic process requires a regular commitment that you can rely upon over time.
In order to provide such a reliable framework we offer all your appointments on a weekly basis at the same time on the same day each week. This means that we reserve a weekly slot with a dedicated therapist and consulting room just for you. When you cancel a session, this slot cannot be offered to anyone else. In this sense, it is a bit like renting a room, in so far as it is your time with your therapist, and cannot be made available for any other client.
Of course, if due to unexpected illness or planned holidays, your therapist is not able to be there, we will not charge you for those times.
We do try our best to set your fees at a level that you can realistically afford and budget for. If you would like to know more about our sliding scale approach, please see a fuller explanation in the ‘Fee Structure’ section of this document.
Help for LGBT people?
Yes, absolutely. Tavistock Relationships regularly works with lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender couples and individuals. We have a range of user-friendly services that can help address the issues that frequently affect the LGBT communities.
Couples and individuals can access our counselling and psychotherapy services, where they can think through their relationships and address the difficulties with the help of an experienced therapist.
Tavistock Relationships also offers a psychosexual therapy service for LGBT individuals and couples who are experiencing a sexual problem or difficulties in their sexual relationship.
In terms of relationships with the whole family, LGBT couples and individuals can also access our Parenting Services where they can think about the way they get along together as co-parents and as a family in general.
And for those times when you might be thinking about separating or reuniting after a separation, Tavistock Relationships' Divorce and Separation Consultation Service can help LGBT couples and individuals to work through their difficulties and reach a place where it is possible to move on, together or apart.
Representation
We value representation from couples and individuals who have finished their therapy on our Service Users’ Group. This group provides invaluable help to us in developing our services and policies.
If you are interested in contributing in this way, please either complete the relevant box in the questionnaire which we will send you when you finish your therapy, or let us know by contacting the Appointments Team.
What do you do with my data? (Privacy Policy)
Tavistock Relationships Couples Therapy Service Privacy Policy.
We have a regularly monitored and updated privacy policy, which you can read in full here.
I want to stop coming to therapy
If you decide you want to stop your sessions, or are unhappy with the therapy you are receiving, we would encourage you to talk through your concerns with your therapist in the first instance.
Often, being able to explore such feelings with the therapist can be very important and lead to helpful change. However, if you feel strongly that you are unhappy with your therapist or the therapy you are receiving and would like to discuss your concerns with someone else, please contact:
One of Tavistock Relationships' clinicians responsible for looking after the service will be happy to discuss your concerns with you and think with you about how best to proceed.
Who can I address comments, feedback, and complaints to?
We are keen to hear your views on our service so we can continue to offer the best possible support. If you are unhappy with the therapy you are receiving or with any other aspect of your contact with Tavistock Relationships, it may be helpful to discuss this with your therapist in the first instance. However, if you would prefer to discuss your concerns with someone else, please let us know by